In talking to a group of 10 year-old girls recently about body image, I am struck at how removed they still are from the judgments about bodies, both their own and others, judgements which seem to come with simply growing up. Now, granted, this is just a small sampling of kids around this age, so it by no means guarantees that there aren’t others with a very different experience. However, it certainly gets me thinking.

When does that shift happens for young girls? When do girls stop seeing kindness and being yourself as something that is attainable? When do they start striving to be like others, accompanied by judgments of those who are not alike?

As we know, there are so many factors that can contribute to the development, or lack, thereof, of a healthy self-image. Maybe these girls happen to have the support systems and encouragement they need to see themselves positively. Or, maybe they just haven’t yet lost their endless optimism and belief that they can do and be anything they want.

Regardless of which might be true, in this case, it certainly makes me wonder. What would it take to preserve that in all young girls? To reach them before society gets to them first with messages of the power of thinness and ideals of “beauty?” As much as I wish our world could change and beauty could be seen as as celebration of unique difference, I don’t know if or when that will happen. What I do think is that we can try, one girl at a time, to change the way bodies are seen and experienced.

Give girls the message that they are beautiful and worthy. Period. Help them see what about them is different and worth celebrating. Teach them how to cope and be resilient against the messages they are going to receive, almost inevitably, telling them the opposite.

This isn’t just for our girls, either. Boys need this just as much, not only for themselves, but as a basis for seeing and treating the girls and women in their own lives accordingly.

It would be a step toward a different world, and it’s a worthwhile goal.

Give someone the message that they are beautiful and worthy.
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