Momentum
Momentum is a funny thing. The way it starts, the way it builds, and the way that when it's stopped, starting it back up again can seem near impossible. Scientifically, it's defined by a moving object's size and speed. In business, it may be measured by financial successes. And then, on a human level, there's psychological momentum.
Please know that at this present moment, my purpose for this mention is simple: mental momentum is a thing. I'm not a psychologist, at least not yet, anyway. I'm not an expert on this. I just know that I've been experiencing something recently that I could only describe as “mental momentum,” so I popped it into Google, and boom— it's a thing.
Last month, I wrote about a personal success I'd had, walking and meeting my steps goal for 59 consecutive days. Because my obsessive-compulsive brain loves numbers and insisting that they have to mean something, I counted out the days and mapped out 100, which happens to be November 12th, just in time for this week's publication.
Now, 59 says of goal-accomplishing is probably an accomplishment in itself. Bringing yourself to finally do something you've long avoided itself is huge. But again, my brain says "59 days? Psh. Call me when it's day 100."
Well, hello, brain. It's day 100.
Now technically, I'm writing this while walking my steps on day 99, but I'll be damned if I make a liar of myself by missing day 100 tomorrow. It's happening, rain or shine or blizzard, even if If I have to pace the stairs of my apartment or walk circles around the coffee table until I get my steps in. It. Is. Happening.
And that right there is huge.
I had originally intended to write about how I recently decided to start wearing a tie to work again, and how that seemingly minor choice has impacted my mindset. I also considered writing about my unexpected loss of 8 pounds. I'll save both of those things for (a) future post(s). It is relevant, though, in that those things are links in a recent chain of events that has led me to, dare I say it... feel good about myself again.
And that right there is also huge.
This post could have gone a couple different directions, one being solemn and reflective, the other being hopefully inspirational. Often when writing about mental health struggles, it's easy to veer towards that first road, but my intention here is to take the latter. As incessantly as an anxious mind insists on whispering "you're not that great," I'll offer this to shut it up:
100 days ago, a goal was set.
On that day, that goal was accomplished
On the next say, it was said, "ok, let's do it again."
And we did it again.
100 days ago I wasn't feeling positively about myself, basically at all. 100 days ago, I didn't know how to change that without changing nearly everything. And then, I changed a thing, and it became a thing.
I've finally started to feel good about myself, my body, or my appearance again for the first time in a while. There were days when no part of me wanted to walk, when it was cold, rainy, and late and I was hungry, tired, and just “over it” that day. But counting to 100 is easier from 59 than starting back at 1, and if I'd already gotten that far…
And so, today, just like I latched onto that one good feeling of accomplishment 100 days ago, I'm now latching onto this newly rediscovered positivity about myself. I'm hopeful. I'm regaining confidence. I'm humbled. I'm inspired, and I'm determined.
And now, I'm passing this momentum onto you.
I'm with you.
Let's do this.
What is one small goal you can set for yourself on a day-to-day basis?
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